Thursday, September 4, 2014

FRIEND routine

SO, everyone has to have friends, right?  Not necessarily.  If your definition of "friend" is defined loosely, then you're not routinely weeding your garden.  (more to come on gardening once i perfect my green thumb.)  But seriously, friendship is a constant evolution process that involves 3 essential steps:

1.  Do they listen?  This is more extensive than a simple "yep....i hear ya, sister" response.  I mean, deep, introspective, thoughtful processing before they spurt out what they THINK you want to hear.  It takes a real "friend" to tell you the truth, even if it's hard to swallow.

2.  Do they share?  We were taught as toddlers to share.  Be selfless with your toys, your princess gowns, and anything we had they didn't.  It has nothing to do with "rich vs poor" or a handout to other's less fortunate.  (yes, that's necessary--but that doesn't forge a friendship.)  It's a give and take that balances each individual EQUALLY.  Opposite from a "me, me, me" perspective 99% of the time.  Once you start sharing start sharing, continue sharing, and toys get stolen without being returned:  it's time to re-define:  Is this a friend or a "mooch"?

3.  Do they reflect WHO you are?  None of us our perfect.  In fact, I have dealt with many of "friends" who have hypocritically (in my opinion) turned their back on me when I was needing them most.  That, in and of itself, is the antithesis of what friendship defines.  However, if their behavior continues to implode beyond intervention, it's time to respectfully bow out.  If it's affecting your marriage, reputation, or religious must draw the line in the sand.

1 Corinthians 15:33
Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”

I am growing every day as a believer and follower of Christ.  Daily, I seek his counsel on how to approach every relationship and barrier in life.  Every day I fail in some way, yet motivates me to seek His answer the next day in devotion and prayer.

Routine has become a mundane, yet necessary daily discipline that promotes growth in so many areas of life.  Friendship, love, health, spirituality, and so much more.  It's a process I'll continue to explore and share in hopes of personal inspirations;  and if I inspire others, it's icing on the cake.  


Saturday, August 30, 2014


the definition of routine is:
"a sequence of actions regularly followed; a fixed program."

I learned this at a an early age by performing routines.  Dance routines.  In order for those routines to be perfected, they were practiced.  Over and over.  Multiple hours a day were dedicated to perfect a routine that was satisfactory to both my dance teacher and drill team instructor. Even my fellow dance team members counted on me, as I did them, to equally work together to attain the best performance possible.  

Routine was introduced to me as a sequence of steps from beginning to end.  Once completed, we moved on to the next routine.  More difficult, more hours, but the discipline was the same.  As I got older, went to college, and entered life without forced discipline, it was solely up to me to continue a routine in order to achieve my personal best.  Sounds easy?  Not really.

We live in a world of instant gratification.  Some people believe it's this generation of young folks that have developed a lazy attitude of entitlement.  But it's not just the young generation.  It's THIS generation.  I was part of it, and have slowly began taking repetitive, baby steps on a daily basis.  Being a spontaneous person has it's advantages.  I'm open to change, adventure, and able to adapt to a new plan without hesitation.  I respect my husband's disciplined routine of waking early, reading his devotional, exercising, and heading to work.  Whistling and happy to do it every morning since I've known him.  (seriously, I have yet to see him NOT get up and repeat that sequence of actions for 6 years.)  "Morning Clay" is my favorite person in the world.  Because "Morning Whitney" is a dreadful person.

Back to my point.  I have recently found myself enjoying a routine that is not forced, rigid, or even difficult.  Just like a diet, when restricting yourself to follow a regimen developed from a person completely unlike yourself.  You will fail.  Well, from "their" expectations.  The only person that can set a successful routine is yourself.  My routine consists of this:

1. Getting out of bed by 8:00 in the morning
2. Spending time with the Lord.  whether it's prayer, reading a devotional my husband has sent me, or talking to a friend about the bountiful blessings he's bestowed on me.
3. SHOWING my husband (not just telling him) that I love him.  Respect him.  The way God has biblically defined my duties as a wife.
3. Talking (not texting) via phone or face-face to a friend or loved one
4. Physical action of some sort.  (notice I didn't say "exercising"...walking dogs, going to workout, but even somedays just taking out the trash to the curb).  Let's face it, there are days when even THAT is a chore

None of those things are ever in a particular order. (except getting out of bed.)  This is where I've decided to start.  Yes, it's a short list.  But it's the time, effort, and dedication to each of these daily PLEASURES....not duties, that have lifted my spirit and motivates me to take it to the next level.  Not because I have to.  But because I want to.  

I've just added a #5 as of today: to begin blogging, at least 3 days a week.  Because it fulfills me and fulfills yet another purpose in my life.  Isn't that what routine is all about?  Steps to execute our purpose in life.  we have to practice everyday to achieve it.